Calm

Tomorrow is the big day.  I can't believe it's finally here.  In April, September seemed so far away and it's here, just one day away.

I had my "Instructions" appointment at ICRM today, where they gave me some to-do's prior to my extraction/retrieval tomorrow and some after to-do's.  I was excitedly greeted by Tami saying "We're here Elaine!  You've made it!" Though, it really has only been five months since we've won our grand-prize, truly it's been six years since the pains of infertility began to tear at me.  But Tami's statement was true: I have made it!

After my appointment Nic asked me how I was feeling and I really didn't have an answer for him.  Not to say that I felt numb, but I'm just calm.  I feel no anxieties. No worries. No stress.  Nothing.  Which is really surprising because I am such a little worry wart.  I think it's the prayers that have been offered by many of you, and to that I say "thank you". Prayers are a wonderful and powerful thing.  Prayers can help miracles happen.  I've seen it.  I know it. These feeling of peace or calm, to me, aren't a sign that things will work how Nic and I will want them too, but is reaffirms to us that no matter what happens, all will be well.  All will be right.

For Christmas Nic bought me a necklace from The R House Couture (there stuff is amazing and so powerful).  It says "Faith, Hope, Courage."  The designers of the necklace said it was for those going through breast cancer or for those that have survived, but Nic bought it for me because it said it is a symbol of everything that I have endured.  Faith has gotten me to where I am today, hope is what sustains me today and courage is what strengthens me for tomorrow.

Tomorrow is not just another day to us.  Tomorrow is the beginning of a new family adventure.