Next Fundraiser: Mini Photo Shoots

After Shandy approached me with her FABULOUS deal (images from shoot to come soon!), she and I discussed other things that I could do and we both thought offering mini photo shoots would be a great offer.  So, Elaine Ward Photography is coming out of retirement to offer this special deal to a handful of people :)

                                               
             

The IVF Mini Photo shoots will be 30 minute long sessions, with 10 of your best images on CD with print release for $125 (a savings of $100).  You also have the option to order professional prints at a 30% discount (price sheet can be provided if interested).

I have reserved Saturday, August 11th for the photo shoot day and have 10 slots available.  4 slots are in the morning (8am-11am) and 6 slots in the evening (4:30pm-8:30pm).  The photo shoots will take place at Katherine Albertson Park in Boise.  

If you are interested, you can email me at: ward_family_2005@hotmail.com.  

Can't wait to have you schedule your session!

Post Edit: People have asked for more samples of my work.  If you're a friend of mine on FB, you have seen plenty of the images I have taken.  But if you're not, you can visit Elaine Ward Photography, as this was my blog when I had a business as a photographer.

Assume the Position: Water Ultrasound and Plan of Care with ICRM-Part I

"Assume the position!" Okay, this isn't something Dr. Slater (or any OBGYN) has said to me, but that's what you feel like when they pull the stirrups out and ask you to put your feet in; it's a position you NEVER get used to.  I always think I'm the only one that has a difficult time relaxing and I told Dr. Slater: "I never get used to doing this."  She told me that if it was something that I got used to, it would be a bad thing because that would mean I had been in there office too much.  Thank you Dr. Slater-I will take the awkwardness and comfortableness any time!

This morning I had my water ultra-sound, which means I had to down 33 oz water in an hour period.  I finished about 1/4 of water and I seriously felt like I was going to be sick.  But I kept chugging.  I finished my water during the drive to ICRM, and about 10 minutes from the office I began to feel every bump and unevenly paved road along the way, not fun.

Once we arrived, I was asked to empty my bladder.  I'll admit I was a little upset because I felt like I drank all that water for nothing, but all is well.  I "assumed the position" and learned some very interesting things.  First, I learned I have a small cervix*, that was one of the first things Dr. Slater told me ("Has anyone ever told you that you have a small cervix?").  I also learned I have a small uterus.  Most uterus' measure 3x5x7 and mine measures 3x5x4, so not too terribly smaller but it is "small."  Good news: I have more follicles.  During this ultrasound we were able to see that I have 16 follicles (3 more than last time) on my right and 10 on my left (number hasn't changed).  I was excited that my follicle count had increased, even if it was just by 3.  I can only hope that my follicle count will continue to increase (increased follicle count leads to increased follicles dropping which leads to increased mature eggs-that's the hope anyways).

Everything else looked great-I was told I have very healthy ovaries and again told that I have no cysts on my ovaries (curse you PCOS!).  After my ultrasound, I had more lab work done-yay.  Blah! Not really, but it's part of the process.  This lab work consisted of an infectious disease panel, anti-mullarian, and a test to check all my hormone levels.

After my lab work was done, Nic and I were swooped away to meet with Jana, where I was filled with both excitement and despair.  Be sure to read PART II.


*I was curious how a small cervix and uterus would affect a pregnancy.  So far, I've learned a small cervix can lead to preterm birth.  This isn't something I'm too excited about as I'm assuming it will mean I will have to be put on bed rest as to make sure that the baby (or babies) enjoy their stay as long as possible.  I don't think I'm made for bed rest :(  But once pregnancy is confirmed, I'll be able to find out more from my OBGYN.  

Keeping it Real: Infertility

Infertility effects more than your reproductive system, it also effects your mind.  It changes the way you view your self worth.  It changes your relationship and it changes your dreams of the family you thought you would have.

I always knew I wanted to be a mom, and I wanted to have five kids.  But as the years ticked away in our marriage and there was no "miracle" baby, I began to wonder if I would ever be a mom.  Maybe motherhood just wasn't my calling in this mortal life.  It made me sad, but I focused on my career, schooling, and then a change of career.  I focused on me. I had to focus on something, or else I would have gone completely crazy.  But focusing on me didn't take away the emptiness in my heart.  I wanted what everyone else seemed to have:  I wanted to change diapers and hear little baby giggles.  I wanted to hear the thumping of little hands and feet as they followed me around the house. 

When we were matched with our birth mom, we were thrilled.  Filled with a sense of hope that all I was not lost.  In the hospital, when I first laid eyes on our sweet baby girl, I was over come with so much emotion.  It was as if all the pain I had from my childless years was gone instantly.  

Seeing baby G grow is such a joy; after having her in our lives for six months we knew we wanted her to have another brother or sister soon. But then all the questions begin filling my mind: how are we going to make this happen?  Will it ever happen? Do we adopt again? Do we attempt for IVF?  How are we going to  get the money for it?  What if we can't get the money?

With all these unanswered questions running through my mind, I began to think that baby G would be our one and only pride and joy.  It's a hard reality; to see the family you've dreamed of slowly slip away from you.  Yes we love our baby G with all our heart and she has made our lives so happy, but when you've dreamed of children sharing toys, chasing each other in the back yard, and having a bed full of children greeting you Christmas morning, a part of your heart aches.  

Whenever I'm playing with baby G and I hear her laughter, or I see her run to me halfway and then turn and run away quickly (because she wants me to chase her), or if she grabs her blanket to snuggle with us, it makes my heart so happy.  And it brings the longing of giving her siblings back to the surface.  September is just right around the corner, and I am both nervous and excited.  Of course, the "what-if's" creep to my mind, but I don't have time to think about that.  Infertility may have delayed the start of our family, but it will not stop us from growing our family. 

Money In, Money Out.

It seems that as soon as we add money to our fund, it goes right out.

We sold an exercise bike fro $75, the next day we have to fill my birth control prescription for $74.  We made $230 at the garage sale and tomorrow I have to go in for my blood drawl and infectious disease panel.   That one is over $300, but luckily we have the money if the overall account.

Sometimes it gets me down that all the money is disappearing and that we're further from our goal, but I know that's not the case.  When money comes in and goes right out, it's one less bill we have to worry about. That's an chunk we can take off of our overall total.  Little by little we're making it toward our goal.

As I start more testing and making more visits to ICRM, it really is making things so real.  Our dreams of growing our family is beginning to come true.

Shandy Vogt Photography Update

Within 3 minutes of the announcement for a session with Shandy the spot was filled!  And it's an engagement session.  It's going to be so amazing.  I'm so excited for the couple and I can't wait to see the pictures.

Thank you to everyone that stopped by to learn more about our story.  We hope you keep checking back for updates.

Shandy Vogt Photography

Shandy Vogt Photography is AMAZING and she has been there since the very beginning of our journey.  

I have always taken our family pictures, but when it came time to do our adoption profile and pass along cards,  I was a nervous wreck!  These pictures had to be just right.  Really capture our personalities.  Those candid moments.  Running from tripod to the "set up" does not give you candid. It usually gives a fake smile because I'm trying to catch my breath from the mad dash I made to make it next to my hubby before the timer goes off. When a friend recommended Shandy, I was thrilled.  She has a talent of capturing those "in the moment" shots  

 In 2009, Shandy took our pictures for our adoption pass along cards (the picture of Nic and I laughing is still one of my favorites to this day.  I didn't even know she was taking pictures).  

In 2010 when we were getting ready to update our cards and our adoption profile, we called on the talents of Shandy again. I have to give huge props to Shandy too because not only did she try to get my shoes in every shot (I told her I went on a mad hunt to find the "perfect" shoes to complete my outfit), but she also helped me with "Operation Ice Cream Revenge." When Nic and I were dating, we got into into and Ice Cream fight and I told Shandy I wanted her to capture my sweet revenge.  Well, as you can see from the picture-I was not victorious.  Maybe we'll have to have an Ice Cream War III???

                                

Then in 2011, as we approached the date of Baby G's birth, I knew exactly who I wanted to capture those first moments of her being home.  It was Shandy who once again who helped capture those special moments for us.  I love looking back on these photos.  Shandy did a wonderful job capturing that sweetness of parenthood.

And now, it's your turn to have your special moments captured by Shandy Vogt Photography! When Shandy learned about our fundraising efforts, she said she wanted to lend us her talents, and let me tell you-you guys are in for a treat! Take a look!

So now you're jumping for joy and can't wait to schedule your session?  Well, step to it because the FIRST person to email Shandy is the lucky winner of this super fabulous deal.  That's all you have to do.  Just write an email.  So simple, right?  

Nic and I are so grateful for Shandy and her kind heart.  If you don't know Shandy you are in for a treat, you will be able to feel her sweetness just oozing from her :)

What are you waiting for?  Email Shandy RIGHT NOW! shandy@shandyvogtphotography.com

Our Adoption Story: The Match

*this story was originally posted February 15, 2011 on our personal blog*

Since we have so many new visitors to our blog, I decided it would be best if I shared the story of how our sweet Baby G came into our lives.

The Match

It happened. It finally happened. Nic and I have been chosen to adopt a baby and we are more than excited. The story (sorry, it's a little long):

As you are all aware, we started the adoption process three years ago. As some of you know, I struggled with my faith and being at peace with this trial since 2006. Though, honestly, the last two years have really been the best for me and the last four months of 2010 really pushed me to my limits. . .of faith that is.

I knew I, personally, needed more faith in my life. But it was hard. I felt like I was doing everything right, though in the back of my mind I knew I still wasn't making the ultimate sacrifice: surrendering everything to the Lord. August 2010, I was compelled to be humbled and turn my faith to the Lord. Trusting that He would provide for Nic and I. It was still hard, but I (we) had done everything we could and it just wasn't up to us anymore. Nic an I came to know that in the end everything would work out and this sacrifice would allow us to have our family.

Now fast forward to December 2010. We felt we needed to really do better on our end to make sure our family happened (we were also compelled again by a letter from LDSFS). We took the necessary steps. Some were long and hard (more paperwork-blah!), while others were easy. We were hit with some speed bumps, but we continued on. We did everything in faith. I personally know that I was doing more things on my end to show the Lord I was faithful. It was a rewarding experience.

January 2011, Nic and I decide to come up with a family theme: "Trust God and believe in good things to come." It seemed fitting for the hopes we had for our family with the new year. Thursday, January 27th Nic and I went to the temple. We hadn't been in a while so it felt good to be there. The temple greeter asked us to participate in a sealing session and we were more than happy too. Before we began our session, I wrote down a list of people I felt needed prayers and placed in the prayer box. On that list I wrote "Ward Birth Mom." We hadn't prayed for her in a while, so it felt good writing her "name" down. Sitting in the sealing room, I was filled with peace and hope. The hope of being able to return there with our future children. With the additional paper work, I had dragged my feet a little, but then finally on Saturday, January 29th I bit the bullet and pushed through it. Monday, January 31st I emailed everything to our case worker. Tuesday, February 1st I got a call.

It was a friend from our old ward wondering if Nic and I were still hoping to adopt. I told her we were and she asked if she could share our information with a family friend. Of course I said yes, but honestly I really didn't think anything would come of it. We had two previous situations come up, but nothing came of them. I wasn't putting all of my eggs in this basket. A few hours later my friend called back, stating that the Birth Mother (BM) was wanting to move forward(!) and gave me her attorney's contact information so we could schedule an appointment with him. I was a little in shock and in somewhat disbelief. I couldn't believe it was that "easy." I think mostly in my mind I had made it into this huge spiritual experience (but looking back, it really was), and so the fact that it wasn't was kind'a a downer for me. But I was happy. Just in complete disbelief. I call the attorney and he tells me that his client (BM) wants to meet us. I call our mutual friend and we get it arranged. I begin reaching out to my friends in the adoption community, because, in all honesty I. AM. FREAKING(!). OUT!!!! They all just reminded me to "breathe". Really? Easier said than done people.

We meet at our mutual friends house and while the conversations were a little awkward at the beginning (think first date/blind date), we soon found our common ground: shoes!!! Once we began talking about shoes, it was like we had been friends forever :) At the end of the night, as she was leaving, she told us: "As far as I'm concerned, the baby is already yours." I had to give Nic's had a little squeeze and steady myself from not wanting to jump on her and give her way too many hugs (though, she has been endearing enough to deal with me when I want to give her a hug. she understands I'm a hugger).

Our sweet BM feels like family already. And she will be. She IS family. We have all decided on an open adoption. She said she never wants to step on our toes or interfere with our parenting styles. I told her that I don't ever want her to feel as if we are being "too open" with her. I told her as long as we keep communicating what we are and aren't comfortable with and as long as we are honest with each other, this relationship (like any relationship) will work.

There are some details that still need to be worked out: mostly, deciding on an attorney. Her attorney said all communication (post placement) would have to go through him "because we don't want birth mom knowing where you live." Um, for reals dude? That's old school and considered closed adoption. Not for us.

The count down to July 17th has begun!

P.S. The sex of the baby is unknown but we will find out (2 weeks). AND the baby will be half Mexican/half Caucasian. My friend said that's while she immediately thought of us.